ioweunothing

namesake

2011-02-12T10:25:00.000-08:00

So many things are happening namesake..existence of every being is namesake..truly there is a supreme power who has the strings to everyone's destiny..i bow to u..almighty..where i can't manage mine alone you manage so many..hats off..
i get up everyday..do non-stop jobs, chores and go to bed..is that what i am supposed to be doing..i have no idea...( now please don't say...'get idea' :-)) we all know we are here for sometime..and that we are alone at the end of the day...there are few people whom we know, we like, love and hate..but still we are alone..and its a hard fact.
what's the logic..why are so many of us here? why are we surviving through all hardships..what is it that is remaining to happen, the ultimate aim of this universe's existence..
its all namesake....truly maya...truly fake

Mid life crisis (benefits)

2009-12-07T22:23:00.000-08:00

I would like to see mid life which i presume is the 30 + and the 40+ people who are neither here anymore nor there yet....as a better pedestal than the other two ..because they are still hopeful, positive and have some rigor left to enjoy life..and at the same time have the experience, maturity to understand life and its hardships , they would have seen quite a bit of it by now..either through struggle to achieve something, or by being thrown onto a moving wheel abruptly or by a death of a near one..they may be better able to understand why things are the way they are..and why they are not the way they are not..
so all of us in the so called middle-aged category..enjoy till you cross the border..

Strange Homosapiens

2009-12-07T22:14:00.000-08:00

I was just wondering one day while passing by a meat shop..( i have eaten meat..and consciously stopped now) that how strange a human being is..haven't we heard stories where we have saved a kitten, or a bird, nursed an ailing squirrel,dog. My son has a gold fish whom he cares more than himself..and cuddled a calf, fed him grass..etc..at the same time among us are people who go hunting and kill animals..either for food or pleasure..most of us eat meat..and are hard core non-vegetarians..isn't it strange ? It may have happened that the same person who hunts a deer, rabbit may nurture a calf, horse,a kitten or for that matter even a rabbit at home. Only that we look at them in a different way when we are dawning different roles..when our objective is to kill (hunt) we dont have any sympathy or feelings towards the animal..and when we are the nurturer, master we will do all that it takes to protect and rear the animal.
amazing human tendency to play roles to suit its emotional desires..
I guess that's how we deal with life and with humans as well..among us are people who kill/destroy humanity for some motive which they believe in and among us are saviours who help the needy,serve in a hospital,old age homes, orphanages..and help to save humanity.
We are indeed a superior race who can do a lot with the great range of emotional arsenal that we have, lest we forget that we all are mortals and will be here not for eternity..so what your purpose in life? i haven't yet figured out mine..:-(

Identity crisis-split personality

2009-09-27T04:17:00.000-07:00

Well i do have an identity crisis out here, and it happens many a times..when i know that this is not how i usually would have reacted, or was that me, or i know i am not feeling what i just said.Sometimes we either underplay or overplay, why do we do that i fail to understand..we are all split personalities.and the moment i know it ,it gets all the more worse.i want to believe in astrology, astronomy,fate,stars, chemicals inside my head and pitiutary gland blah blah..aren't these all responsible to make me feel, say,do things the way i do.or else what is it?
At one shot I am shy,kind hearted,honest..and at the same time i am confident,suspicious,short tempered,unaccepting..how is it possible to have contrasting traits..in a certain scenario u r shy and suddenly some other situation u r super confident. Somewhere you r so kind and softspoken and other place you are shouting, yelling and abusive..that's what i am and i feel caught, entangled in my split personalities, trying to become the positive , but feeling negative..and just not knowing where to go..all the best to those who know me..coz they r in for some split-trouble..

Questions in my head

2008-07-19T11:51:00.000-07:00

I always have infinite questions running across each other at a point of time..and they cross so switfly and rapidly that the traffic causes throbbing of nerves..which in simple language is defined as headache.whether i am handling it properly, whether my action will result in a negative effect, whether i am doing justice to my life,my profession,whether things are gonna be fine, whether this is a tough period or there are tougher times to come, whether i am happy, whether i am making others sad, whether my behaviour is decent, whether my conversation makes sense to someone, whether i am looking good etc etc,..so many of them probably no answer or multiple answers..further confusion.
I wonder if everyone has these, how do others deal with such situations in their life, the most complicated aspect of anyone's life is to learn how to manage, nurture relationships. I feel certain relationships automatically fall in place, but others need you to turn upside-down, prove yourself every minute and then complete the job.
I feel i am unable to cope..i have failed many times and now no more trials..
Many agony aunts for this..but no publications.

Art of Giving

2008-06-06T22:34:00.000-07:00

Sounds familiar with something, well this is the 'art of giving' which indeed is an skill very few of us possess, but imust say by personal experience that it is magical and does wonders..obviously when there is 'giving' there is 'taking' involved too by the other entity to whom you are giving, but it makes a lot of sense to be in the former category than the latter, at the end of the day what will give you satisfaction and probably some solace is that you were not selfish.
i may be sounding biased here, but i can say with lot of assurance that its the women who are at a higher pedestal mostly when it comes to 'giving', also you need to master the skill and not be selective all the time.. it has to be natural and not doctored, and it should be really of use to the other person then in true sense you have 'given' and not 'taken' and learnt the 'art of L(g) iving'.what say....

Making a mark without a marker

2008-04-30T10:31:00.000-07:00

If you hear praises, no doubt it gives you pleasure, confidence and the extra edge that is required to keep ourselves going.

But what's the shelf life of that praise, or rather the cause of the praise, does it last longer than it is supposed to or its like a bubble, its there and then the next moment gone.

To sustain an admiration is a challenge, have you been able to influence another life, soul, made a mark,inspired a being..if yes then you have a meaningful life.

I love to collect various coloured marker pens for highlighting, imp points are marked for future reference. That's how we should be etched in someone's life, in bold bright colours, reminding them constantly of the impact we have made and how positive the impact was..can be only known by the way the person responds when you meet them.

Its all so difficult yet so doable and so rewarding..so go ahead and be a marker..you wont loose your ink in the process, is my guarantee...;-)

Being Mum

2008-01-19T06:15:00.000-08:00

Being Mum, No i am not talking about what you are thinking here, not about being a mother, disappointed is it??well sorry for the illusion.. i read an article on "Being a Mum" sent by a friend and loved it, just because when they talk all great things about being a mother, it feels so good to be one.
But let me come to what i am actually talking about here, i.e. to embrace silence, to utter nothing at all. I know its difficult infact almost close to impossible to be mum..but it works wonders in most of the situations even where you probably need to speak..i am sure many would disagree with what i am saying, but it has higher benefits than expected.so be mum and enjoy the outcome as its truly rewarding to be mum...sssshhhhhhhhh.

Gift of life, labour of love, birth of humanity

2008-01-09T06:05:00.000-08:00

The gift of life is beyond labour of love which gives birth to humanity and beings who co-exist.
Its just the depth of complexity that leaves you mesmerized.
Many times i find myself struggling to live and fight for my survival. i feel i may not belong here.
But that's what applies to all, actually all are fighting for their own survival and figuring out a comfort path to tread on..doing a job, maintaining a relationship, parenting,homemaking,socializing all these are means to hold on to life..but there is no set formula, to each his own,all are pregnant with loads of gyan to disseminate, oozing with thoughts, advices to be delivered..without any labour pains offcourse :-)
everyone has a point of view on life, others, how things should be or shouldnt be, only to realize that its all an imaginary world we have created and are living, treating it as real.
Real truth is that the life you have is shortlived and so just be 'there' when its needed, where you are needed, do what is required and be with someone who needs you , not the one whom you need , that's the catch..hmm difficult, yep that's the puzzle we all need to crack, and i have it as a hobby, a pastime so let me get closer to the answer..wish me luck..

Gave some,have some,want some more ?

2007-07-29T23:02:00.000-07:00

The desires are endless, we start with something, then we give some,get some more,we keep some..and want more, and ....
The circle of money,love and life goes on forming a downward spiral..downward yes offcourse ultimately you are going to go alone..not with something..but with nothing.
Everyone is sub consciously aware of this fact that they came alone and they will go alone, this is life and its utter harsh truth, yet we kill people,quarrel,compete, fight, crib, complain and destroy the little time we probably have in this world..ultimately to get 'nothing' in return..(remember u take 'nothing' with you..)
why am i even writing this, why am i spending so much time to think about the facts of life..
probably noone will ever read this, or probably someone will, so what , how will it matter, what difference does it make.? if it makes a difference so what, i won't be there to see..i keep questioning and answering myself, i am sure these FAQs are there in all of our minds..and we have the answers ready..the interesting thing is that questions more or less remains same but the answers differ..based on our mood,life experiences, attitude and that moment.
'That Moment' probably the most precious of all..because it will just go away and will never come again, how can i hold on, rather treat every moment like 'that one' , its so interesting and startling how life has constituted itself, so complex yet so simple, so harsh yet so gentle, so tough yet so easy, so much alive yet so lifeless..well this is the monotonous monotony..live it and live it right now.. as u may not see tomorrow as it never comes.
dont want anything, just have what you got, may be you wouldnt have had that too then..cherish the 'have' and chuck the 'want'

Being blessed is blissful....

2007-07-24T03:51:00.000-07:00

Sometimes its good to enjoy the feeling of being blessed. Though this should be the case always, but we have to keep reminding ourselves that we are human at the end and so we have to crib, complain,detest,want more and dislike, unacknowledge what we already got..
But still once in a while thanking your stars, almighty for showering that extra blessing uplifts the spirits.
let me also do this and really thank everyone - stars, luck, fate, destiny and my loved ones for being there and giving me all that i have got..there is nothing more i could have asked for..
atleast i can hope and wish that even GOD reads blogs..if not write one..
Its our shortcut to feel on top of the world, get kicked and motivated to be better human beings and feel worthwhile..
so dont wait just go ahead and 'do it' ..believe me its a great feeling to be blissfully blessed....:-) :-)..atleast once in while..

Self-worth - a dish cooked in your head without the pressure valve

2007-07-11T00:40:00.000-07:00

Feeling of self worth ,its an accomplished emotion which not everyone experiences and not everyone knows what and when exactly do you get it. Its a rare phenomenon.
But ultimately its all cooked in your own head, if you want you can blow the whistle and let the pressure release, but yet most of the times we do not let it happen..
Why should people around you make you feel your worth, are we in a bazaar, or we assume conveniently being priced, marked with a value and the scale of the marking is also in our own head which tell us that you are worthful or worthless.
The 'being' the 'self' is an entity that exists because other similar entities surround it and make its existence worthwhile.
if the 'self' was just single it wouldn't be needing to value itself, as there is nothing and noone who asks for it or sells it.
You cannot auction self when you dont have buyers.. so the funda is simple..'being your ownself' is nothing but 'being how others want you to be', so keep juggling the 'self ' part and believe me its not worth it to have a feeling of self worth...as its actually not yours..confused right..
its quite complex, when you are not yourself only will you understand..

ioweunothing

2007-06-26T00:04:00.000-07:00

I am so glad that i owe you nothing.being indebted of anything is a huge burden. one is already crushed under the huge loans as a result of the so-called 'GREED' for materialistic liabilities..
Will i ever be free of these debts..i need to repay a lot of other intangible,unidentifiable items to a lot of people.
Why do i feel so happy then, that i owe you nothing.
Its an irony where i do my own credit,debit of stuff which i have and i need to pay back.
i try to weigh all that has never been measured before and will never be..
what is the unit of these measures, its in a bit, or an inch, or a gram.
Its my own scale which allows me the benefit of weighing and comparing and coming to a simple, convenient and self-fulfilling conclusion that i owe you nothing.
may you beg to differ, please get the ledger copy... ( do you have any ? ;-)

Spicy and tangy flavoured life served with hot chillie peppers

2007-06-25T00:39:00.000-07:00

Sssssssssshaaaaaaaaaaa..i gulp a glass of water when i realized i have been served hot chillies in the camouflage of something else..why does it happen that when you are not ready for it, u just bite in a chilly and all your senses react to it instantly and the only thing u long for that particular moment is something cold,sweet and soothing. May be Honey...mmm
honey has a distinct attraction which makes it a special entrant in the household.
Life also comes in such tangy, sour,vinegar soaked flavours that you need HONEY to keep the taste buds alive and balanced.
currently i have been missing HONEY in my life and am tired of the tangy,pungent flavours served every now and then.
i need to go and look for it right away....i wish i could ask one for home delivery ;-)